Peanut Butter Pits
As you all know, I'm training for a figure competition and I really haven't updated the whole PNP world lately as to what is going on with me. The girls get a blow-by-blow account in my journal but I thought I would blog tonight rather than just journal and whine about how tired I am to them. Now you can all hear my cry baby ways! Woot.
Today was not a great day. I'm not sure what is going on with me but this week I have been more miss than hit with the diet. I want this so bad but I have truly struggled to stay on plan. We cut my carbs (my request) this week and it has ruined me. I've done fine not having carbs; it's me wanting unlimited amounts of my all natural, no sugar peanut butter that is breaking me in two. Yesterday I snuck in some extra (it's on the menu but just enough to make me mad) and then today I just sat down with the jar and ate about six good tablespoons full. Ugh...it settled hard on my tummy especially when I did heavy back day and cardio. 
Like a drunk doesn't keep booze in their house or work in a bar, I'm sending the PB to hubby's office tomorrow. Uhhh...this is jar three going there. I was supposed to have this PB for my splurge meal this week with some Mexican. Well, PB is out and now I'm down to a healthy Mexican splurge.
My lesson today was this: I have to want this even when the going gets tough. Just because I'm working harder than ever and willing to extend my second round of cardio, it doesn't excuse falling off my plan. It really doesn't because then the next time I want the PB I'll just try to erase the wrong. It's the habit that must be broken and not the deed. I guess through all this competition training I will truly see how tough I am.
So, what is my schedule like these days? 45 min. of fasted as hard as I can stand it cardio every day until the competition (Aug. 16) and that might be more towards the end. I typically do things like my "hood" workout that is now on Youtube or anything that makes me work my legs. Then later in the day, five days a week, I do 45-60 min. of strength training followed by another 30-45 minutes of cardio. All of my workouts are filled with lunging, squatting, climbing stairs, bleachers, sprints, and the like. I do things that work the gams since they are my weak area.
Diet, it's not fancy. Fish, tuna, chicken, flank steak, egg whites, brocolli, spinach, asparagus, grapefruit, almonds, cream of rice, sometimes sweet potatoes, and vinegar are about the extent of the food lists. I'm used to it but I still have my days as I discussed above.
I'm looking better than I probably ever have. This week I will take more pictures and post in the forums. I'm hoping to see good progress from the pictures of two weeks ago. I guess the fat girl in my head isn't really allowing me to see it since I'm still mad at myself over the peanut butter. But, as I tell the girls, move on. Can't do anything now but work harder and smarter.
Well, sleep is also important so I shall go get me some of it. As I told someone at the gym today, sleep is one of the few things in life that I feel IS NOT overrated. :)