Corinne Crabtree:
Good morning, everyone. Welcome to our Q&A. I am Corinne Crabtree. If you’re watching the replay, I am the host of the Losing 100 Pounds Podcast with Corinne. You can find it on iTunes. You can go over there right now. You can always download it and start listening to 300 plus episodes of me giving you straight talk all about out weight loss, how I lost a hundred pounds, how I teach other women how to lose 100 pounds. And it’s completely free. It is on your phone, if you are an iPhone user. There’s an app called Podcast. All you got to do is open it. Search for my name, Losing 100 Pounds with Corinne, C-O-R-I-N-N-E. And you’ll be in business. I am also the CEO and founder of the No BS Weight Loss program, where I have over 12,000 members losing weight, becoming boss ass bitches in weight loss.
Corinne Crabtree:
And today is our public Q&A, which means that anybody who listens to me regularly or who would like to ask questions about weight loss, today is your day. Hello, y’all. I see everybody pouring in. Matea, hello. How are you? So here’s how things are going to work. Some of my team is over in the Facebook chat. They will be there posting things, answering questions. They’re also going to give me questions to talk to you about. So all you need to do is use #Ask and you can post a question. If you are a No BS woman, use #NoBSwoman, and you can also ask your question there. And we will try to prioritize some of the questions according to our No BS women. Last but not least, I have to clean my glasses. Otherwise, Corinne can’t see. We will make sure I can read all the questions.
Corinne Crabtree:
If you’re brand new to me, here’s what you need to know about the way I teach weight loss. I don’t do calories. I don’t do keto. We don’t do points. We don’t do a bunch of horse shit. It’s called the No BS Weight Loss program for a reason. We’re not doing bull shit dieting here. It’s common sense, easy fucking steps, lots of cursing. I’m in your face. And if you don’t like it, here’s what you do. You leave the Facebook Live. You leave quietly. Guess what? My mother’s here. I got this mouth from my own mama. So I don’t need you being my mama and telling me how to use my own mouth. So I always tell people from the get go, if you don’t like sass, you don’t like some cursing, you got to move along because we ain’t got time to try to change Corinne. She’s 47 years old. She has done epic changes in her life around her weight and around many things. But my cursing is one of the things I happen to love about me. And I don’t change the shit that I love about me. And neither should you.
Corinne Crabtree:
So with that said, and the glasses are clean. Let’s get going. All right. Today’s first question is, how often should I weigh myself? And I think this is a great question. One that I want to address specifically for the No BS Weight Loss women who are watching. Number one, in May, starting, you’ll get the entire course on April 25th. That will be a brand new course to the membership called Conquering the Scale. It is going to be eight videos, all about the different aspects of weighing in. How do you talk to yourself on the scale? How do you not let it ruin your day? How do you not do fuck it eats, because it’s up down, maintaining, whatever? You know how it is. We get on the scale. We lose weight. Guess what? Let’s go eat. We can relax a little. We gain weight. Guess what? Let’s go eat. Fuck this. Nothing’s working, I’ll start back tomorrow. We maintain. Fuck this, let’s go eat. We are always in fuck it mode, it seems like around the scale. So we fuck our attitude. We fuck up our day. We fuck up our food. We fuck up our results.
Corinne Crabtree:
So I wanted to create an entire comprehensive program for all of you. So you will have plenty of help next month, figuring this out. Now for all of you, this is how often I tell people to weigh. If you are brand new, like you have not listened to the podcast at all. I would go by this rule. I would weigh if you feel like you won’t traumatize yourself because of it. Listen to me. In my program for my No BS women, this is what I’m teaching you. I want you to make sure that you understand that weighing is one of those things where we have been traumatized our entire life around the number. Our entire lives.
Corinne Crabtree:
Raise your hand today if you are a Weight Watchers recovered. Maybe you’re still having some weight watcher draw going on in your life. I don’t have anything against Weight Watchers. What I don’t like about Weight Watchers is they do not address the mindset part that so many of us sorely need. So I have been to Weight Watchers meetings where, for the entire day leading up to it, I had to go to meetings at night. And because I went at night, that meant I would spend an entire day not eating, not drinking water, worrying about what did I pick to wear this week? Is it heavier than what I wore last week? Would there be too many people in the line to take my shoes off? Do I wear my heavy jewelry today or not?
Corinne Crabtree:
The problem with doing that is that when you catch yourself doing those kinds of antics, you’re no longer focused on weight loss. You’re no longer focused on treating yourself with respect. When you’re thinking about the clothes you should wear to get on the scale, when you’re thinking about starving yourself all day long to lose weight, here’s what you don’t have time to think about, how to love yourself, how to give yourself good quality foods for fuel and energy and weight loss. All of that, you just don’t have time for. Another way. I remember going to Trainers. And I had one trainer in particular one time, who literally told me. I was getting on the scale and I weighed about 250 pounds at the time. And I had lost three pounds. And this motherfucker literally looked at me and said, “You’re a big girl. You should be losing faster than that.” I had lost three pounds that week.
Corinne Crabtree:
And so, y’all, I want you to think about this. It is normal to get on the scale and feel like trauma, worry, anxiety, to get scared, to have all those emotions. We’ve been conditioned for a long time. And what we have to do is de-condition ourselves around all that. The first step in doing it is just noticing that this happens to you. You have fear and anxiety before you get on the scale. You get on the scale, and you notice your rocking your body and all the different ways, just to make sure that it goes down an extra 10th of a point so that you can feel good about yourself. Then you get off the scale. And the next thing you know, you’re talking to yourself like an asshole about like, well, at least it was down this week. I got lucky. That’s not being nice to yourself. Telling yourself you got lucky because you lost weight is not kind.
Corinne Crabtree:
When you lose weight, you need to celebrate yourself. The scale’s not doing shit to you. It is just giving you a number. If you lose weight, you’ve got to be taught how to say, “I’m so proud of myself for these reasons. I did these things this week. I said no to these things. In the moments I wanted to eat, I didn’t because I’m now learning to think these things about myself.” It is critically important. So I want you to think about yourself for a moment. And I want you to think about, if I have a ton of fear and anxiety around the scale right now, then I don’t want to be weighing every fucking day.
Corinne Crabtree:
You’re just setting yourself up to have fear and anxiety every single day if you don’t know how to start rewiring the conversations that you have before, during and after weighing in. That is a process. That is not a process that I can teach on a Facebook Live in one day. That is what my members are going to be doing next month. They’re going to have a whole month of deconditioning diet trauma around the scale. But for the rest of you, here’s my advice. You pick one day a week, or you pick one day a month. And that is the time where you weigh in. And before you get on, you get your panic and your fear going, and then you take a few deep breaths and you tell yourself, “That’s normal. All I’m going to do is step on the scale. I’m going to see my number. My brain’s probably going to freak out again. And then it may freak out 30 more times today. But I’m very prepared for that now.”
Corinne Crabtree:
Most of y’all go into it unprepared. And you’re just swallowed up in the tsunami of emotion and the tsunami of self-loathing. And you don’t know how to get out of it. The best way to get out of it is first to anticipate that it’s going to happen. That is the best way. So you do that. And then you see the number, and you prepare for the next tsunami to come through. And you calm yourself one more time. And you say, “I knew that would happen. That’s the number.” You get off the scale. You calm yourself again. Your brain is used to throwing shade like a fucking pro baseball player. It’s not going to stop because you listened to one Q&A with me on a Facebook Live you randomly found scrolling through the Facebook. So you do that.
Corinne Crabtree:
Then this is the key step to changing the relationship for everyone. My podcast, if you will listen to the Losing 100 Pounds Podcast. It is literally 300 episodes where I talk all the time about all the different ways that you can rewire how you talk to yourself. Weight loss is all about how you talk to yourself. The key thing you have to know is that once you weigh in, you go back and you look at the week, and you don’t trash yourself. You don’t be an asshole to yourself. And you look for the things you did or did not do to explain the number.
Corinne Crabtree:
Now, I advise everyone, you do that on paper. This is what most of y’all do. It’s like, well, I hear Corinne say to sit there and think about my actions and behaviors. So you’re driving to work and you’re trying to do all this inside your head. And your head is a fucking shit show. Your head is worried about what everybody’s going to think of you. Your head’s worried that you are never going to lose weight. Your head’s all pissed off that traffic is backed up. Your trying to think through it, it’s going to compete with the other 1,000 thoughts you have going on in your head.
Corinne Crabtree:
And so what you want to do is you actually want to do it on paper. So you want to say, I weighed this, this week. It resulted in X amount of pounds up, down, or the same. And my best guess as to why this happened are these reasons. And if you have data, go look at your data. My No BS women, you go to your custom planner, you look at your actions. We have recorded history of all of it. If you don’t have that, you think about, all right, are there times when I’m eating too much food? If so, when? How often? This is the thing, you want to explain the number with actions. Actions don’t sound like this. You’re fucking lazy. Here’s why you gained two pounds this week. Well, you’re a lazy ass who can never lose weight. That’s a shitty ass opinion of yourself.
Corinne Crabtree:
That’s not a reason. A reason would be. I looked back this week and I noticed that every night after my go to bed, I go to bed with Mr. Oreo and make love to him until the sleeve’s gone. That would be a reason. That would give you some information about what to change this week. You want to sit there and think about, all right, if I notice I’m going to bed with a sleeve of Oreos every night. This week, instead of just saying I won’t at all, what could I do to relax at night after my kids go to bed? And how could I eat something that would wean me off of a sleeve of Oreos so I can make some improvements for the next week?
Corinne Crabtree:
That’s how we want to start weighing in. We don’t want to weigh our self-esteem. And that’s the problem most of us are running into, we’re weighing our self-esteem all the time. We’re not weighing our actions and behaviors. So if it was me, if you have a lot of diet trauma around the scale, I would do it when you know that you would sit down later with a piece of paper and give yourself the gift of a thoughtful reflection and assessment. That’s how I would do it.
Corinne Crabtree:
All right. Let’s see. What do you do when you have your 24 hour plan all planned out, and then you have unexpected wrenches thrown into your day and can’t be at home and be in charge of your meal? The first thing that you’re telling yourself is, I’m not in charge of the meal. Last time I checked, every one of us is in charge of whatever we put in our mouth. Raise your hand if, more than 10 times in the last month, someone tied you down on the floor and shoved Twinkies and Ding Dongs in your mouth. That never happens. But when you say like, I’m not in charge of my meals. That is a bald faced lie. You are in charge of whatever you put in your mouth. Nobody’s sticking the fork in for you. You ain’t no baby. Nobody’s playing airplane with you, and woo. Nothing’s pulling into the hangar. So it’s real important that you listen to your mindset. This is what I was telling y’all about the scale.
Corinne Crabtree:
What is weight loss? Weight loss is about losing the mental weight first so the physical weight can come off second. And when we sit there and tell ourselves, I’m not going to be in charge of my meal, we take all of our power and all of our authority away from ourselves. Guess what you’re in charge of? How much you eat, if you decide to eat that, if you want to wait until you get home to eat, if you want to make yourself something else.
Corinne Crabtree:
I tell you what, if my 24 hour plan says one thing and somebody else wants to do another. This happens often in my relationship, my husband often loves to go to the bar. He wants to have a couple of drinks, that kind of thing. And he wants to eat a burger and fries at the bar every single time. Corinne don’t want to do that. Do you know what Corinne does? I go with him. I enjoy the fuck out of him. I talk to him. I connect. I have learned to have a good time without a hamburger having to be part of going down my gullet in order for me to have a good time.
Corinne Crabtree:
I had to be okay with the idea of like, I decide what’s acceptable and what’s not. A lot of you have these fake ass rules in your head like, wouldn’t it be weird if I didn’t eat? Do you know what I think is weird? Eating just because you’re sitting there. I don’t think the human body was designed to have food shoved in its mouth to be polite. Nowhere did I read in the Bible that the good Lord say, “Here’s what I want you to do. I want you to treat your body like it’s somebody else’s. Please everyone else first.” Y’all, you got to question everything you believe about food. I don’t think it’s weird at all to go sit in a restaurant and enjoy my time with somebody while they’re eating when I’m not hungry. I think that’s called normal. I think that’s called respecting my body. I think that’s called an amazing way to lose weight and keep it off. To be able to go anywhere and enjoy myself without food, I think is pretty fucking great. So it’s real important that we question all this stuff.
Corinne Crabtree:
So if you have your 24 hour plan done. And let’s say, I would never call it also an unexpected wrench thrown into things. That’s like the telenovela way of describing it. I would just say like, sometimes I have a plan and somebody wants to go out to eat. Sometimes I have a plan. They want to cook something else. Do you notice how the temperature is taken down? Do you notice how we’re not talking about it like this is a major problem? Sound the alarm. This ain’t no Beyonce song. So what we want to do is, we want to just talk about things in a more like just normal, empowering way. Sometimes these things happen. Sometimes you may want to eat whatever they’re having, just like your reasons.
Corinne Crabtree:
Every now and then I will go some place. This weekend’s a good example. I went out on Saturday. Y’all probably not going to love this. But one of my favorite foods in the entire world is fried chicken livers. I am a Southern girl at heart. My granny made me fried chicken livers when I was little. I have loved them my entire life. We had decided we were going to this little restaurant that’s in our town. I went ahead and looked at the menu ahead of time. I was like, oh, this looks great. This’ll be easy to order. I get there. Fried chicken livers was on the menu. I had the fried chicken livers. I liked my reason. I rarely get them. They’re hard to find. They remind me of my granny. That, to me, is a reason I’m a hundred percent behind all the time.
Corinne Crabtree:
Remember when I said weight loss is mental. We just want to make sure that what we’re thinking about our decisions like what we eat, we like our reasons for it. Now, if I go to the restaurant suddenly with my husband and it’s just burgers and fries, something that I can get anytime, that I have no personal connection to, I could give a shit about. I like a good burger and fry, but it ain’t special. I can put that on my plan anytime. They’re not hard to find. I’m okay. My reasoning in that moment is, I’m just going to enjoy Chris and then eat the food I have planned at home, when I get home. That’ll be fun. So you just want to make sure that you are remembering. It’s so much about your reasons.
Corinne Crabtree:
Can you give me advice on how to talk to my 30 year old daughter? I don’t have much weight to lose, but have gained so many skills with you, but my daughter needs serious help. First thing I would do is probably just point her to the podcast. It a lot easier if you can get her to listen to the podcast, or maybe y’all can go someplace and you can play it in the car and just be like, oh my gosh. And pick one of your favorite episodes and just say like, “You got to hear this one.” Pick one where I was just like saying all the crazy shit, something that’s funny, but also she’d be like, huh, I’d never a thought of it that way. That would be the easiest way. Because sometimes what happens is we want to talk to our kids even when they’re in their 30s. And then we get so nervous that we’re going to, I don’t know, like, fuck them up, that we don’t get the message across the way we want.
Corinne Crabtree:
So here’s the deal. If you do want to talk to your daughter, I would just ask her, just simply ask her. Like, “I’ve been listening to this lady. She talks about this. What do you think? Have you ever heard of anything like that?” That’s sometimes some of the easiest ways to get a conversation started. So, if you go back through and take the free course again, so if you go to No BS woman or NoBSfreecourse.com, and you take my free course, listen to the videos. And then just ask her. Like, in video one, I teach exactly when to eat. We’re going to wait until we’re hungry and we’re going to stop at enough. And so you might want to talk to her about just the idea of, “I’ve really been listening to this lady. It makes so much sense that instead of counting calories and doing all this other stuff, that we figure out how to just wait until we’re hungry to eat. I’d never even thought about it that way. What do you think about that?” Then when you ask, what do you think about that? You’ll get her thoughts.
Corinne Crabtree:
And I would bet you that if you’ve listened to my podcast long enough, when she starts giving you her thoughts, you are going to remember things that I have taught. But the best way for all of you to talk to children and stuff is not to force all this on them, it’s to really just introduce a concept and then ask them, “What are your thoughts on that?” That’s the best way to help people, is to understand how they’re thinking.
Corinne Crabtree:
Just so everybody knows, who’s watching, we have quite a few spammers in here today who are just posting all kinds of horse shit. My team is here. Guess what y’all get to do. You get to enjoy the ride. You don’t have to work hard. My team will make sure to delete and block any motherfucker that’s acting like a-hole. That’s why I bring them to these calls. Because I want to take care. I don’t care if you work with me inside of No BS or whether you’re a boot strapper who’s just listening to my podcast. Our job is to take care of you. So let my team take care of them. Y’all don’t have to complain out them. You don’t have to alert us. We are going to take care of it for you.
Corinne Crabtree:
All right, everybody. I would like to journal, but I’m having trouble getting it done. I set a goal to do three times a week, and haven’t reached the goal in three weeks. What are your best tips to get into journaling? Well, number one, most of the time when we want to start something new, we have shitty thoughts about it, and we wonder why it’s really hard to want to do it. So for the majority of you, let’s use journaling as an example, or planning your food or whatever thing that you’re going to do when it comes to installing a new habit. The first thing you have to remember is that anytime you’re going to start something new, your brain is always going to offer noise up first. It’s going to have a lot of reasons why it shouldn’t do it. Most of it doesn’t even make sense.
Corinne Crabtree:
If you really were to listen. So one of the things that you could make one of your journaling sessions is like, okay, this week, at least one time I want to journal around why I don’t want to do it. Why do I think it’s so hard? What does my brain keep offering up to me that seems really important and true? Then you read back over it. And I would literally put an X next to things that aren’t even really true. So I do this with my clients all the time. They will tell me something. They’ll tell me their thoughts, and I’ll be like, “All right, I want you to just pause for a second. When you think that journaling is too hard to do, I want you to drop into your body. And on a scale of one to four, one being a hundred percent like Bible truth, four being a hundred percent big ass lie, where are you on the scale? And you’ll rate it based on how you feel.
Corinne Crabtree:
If you’re closer to it being true, then you want to give yourself reasons why it would be worth it. This might seem true right now because it’s the only way I’ve been thinking about it, that it’s really hard. But what’s also true is that I’ve heard it works. So it seems like something I should try. So you want to always, when something feels really true, you want to be able to do the and. Because when something feels true, what a lot of people try to do is just willpower their way to doing it. It’s like, well, I just want to keep thinking it’s hard and make myself do it. And we can do that for a little bit. But eventually we get burned out, we get exhausted, and we get tired of fighting.
Corinne Crabtree:
That’s why I say you got to lose the mental weight before you lose the physical weight. Because a lot of us try to lose weight that way. It’s like, well, this keto bastard over here told me I should cut out all the carbs and only eat the keto. And y’all, before anybody’s like, “I do keto. It’s so wonderful.” That’s fine. If you love it and it works for you, and you have a thousand good reasons, then I would go all in. But I’m talking to these keto people who have keto bro in their life. And keto bro comes over and is like, “This will be the best thing you ever do for yourself. And it’s the only way you’re ever going to lose weight. And carbs are like evil and blah, blah, blah.” And you’re like, oh fuck me. I love pasta. I love bread. And well, I’m going to do this because I don’t know how to fucking lose weight. I’ve never been good at it. Carbs are evil. And you have all of that doo-doo thinking while trying to cut them out.
Corinne Crabtree:
Well, you burn out and you get exhausted and tired. And the first time the scale doesn’t move. Guess what? It’s fucking eat time. It’s like, well, this isn’t working because you are so primed with your old willpower thoughts. So willpower is where I have really harsh, shitty thoughts, and I’m just trying to make myself do shit. What we want to do is we want to be committed. Committed is different. Committed is where, like with journaling, you’re going to have like, journaling is really hard. A committed person would be telling themselves, and I’ve seen it work for other people. And so it’s worth trying. That changes everything on the inside. You go from forcing yourself to committed to trying, because now you’ve given yourselves reasons to do it. Whereas before, you’re only thinking of the reasons why you don’t want to do it.
Corinne Crabtree:
If you are closer to, let’s say you drop into your body and it’s like, journaling is hard. And you’re like, well, I don’t even really believe that. I mean, all it is is getting out a piece of paper. It’s really just picking up a pen and writing. I can see why I think it’s hard. But actually, technically, it’s just writing down a few things on a piece of paper, especially if you’re one of my members, because we give you journal prompts. You ain’t even got to ask yourself questions. We give you questions. So if that’s you, then all you have to do is start reminding yourself more and more of all the reasons why it’s important, and then be alert. So with your list, when your brain offers up noise, you just tell yourself, I don’t even believe that. That is just my brain fighting it.
Corinne Crabtree:
I recently started a prayer journal, so I don’t go to church. One of my goals this year is to get back to going to church. I’ve got some things I want to work on. My boys are not religious. Majority of my family’s not super religious. But I grew up Catholic. And I’m kind of at that time in my life where I feel like I need some spiritual connection in my life. And the way that I want to spiritually connect is by going to church. My son, he’s not religious. He spiritually connects with the environment, with the universe, he does his own thing.
Corinne Crabtree:
So I decided, first step I was going to take was to start a prayer journal because I’m really good at writing. And I thought, you know what? I’m going to write a letter to God every day. Every day. I’m just going to write me a short little letter. I’m going to tell him what I’m thankful for. And I’m going to pray for people. I pray for Ukraine every day. I pray for the longevity of my husband. I pray that my son will make friends. No BS women, I pray for y’all every day. So many of y’all are suffering through things. I pray for y’all to have wisdom and guidance and all kinds of stuff. So anyway, this is not a hard task. I have been doing this for about 60 days now. And do you know that my brain every day still wants to tell me, you can skip that today. You can do it later. I’ve noticed that my brain went from skipping it to now trying to just get me to move it later.
Corinne Crabtree:
Habits, for them to be really consistent and for your brain to quit offering so much noise, it doesn’t take 21 days. It takes about 90 days. The first part is like, you have to be so conscious about doing it. Then after that, your brain automatically thinks it’s time to do it. Like it remembers to do it, but it still argues doing it. It’s like, I know I’m now in the habit of doing this, but I don’t really want to, for these reasons. That last part of the 90 day cycle is where your brain really starts thinking more about the benefits. It stops thinking so hard about it. It stops wanting to deprioritize it. So it’s just important for all of you to recognize that that happens. All right. So that’s how you can help yourself with the journaling.
Corinne Crabtree:
Let’s see. I followed you perfectly. Lost weight. And then I knew better and thought I don’t need to plan it out anymore. Do you still write it down every day, even today? Basically asking if I just got to suck it up. You don’t have to suck anything up. But if you can lose all your weight and you get to a point where you don’t need to write it down, and you are consciously making great choices and doing the things and you notice that you’re not overthinking food and all this other stuff, you don’t have to do it. There’s no sucking up anything. There’s making a decision. I write mine down every day. It is in this iPad right now, my entire food plan for the day. You know why? Because it makes my day easier. I don’t feel like I’m sucking it up. I don’t feel like it’s bad that I have to do this. I don’t think it’s unfair, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah.
Corinne Crabtree:
You know what else I write down every day, what I’m going to fucking do in my business? I make a plan every day for how I’m going to show up. I don’t think of a plan as sucking it up in a grind. I think of a plan as the best way I love myself. I sit down and think about, here are the things I get to eat today. Here are the things I’d love to eat today. Here’s the things I’m going to plan so I don’t even have to think about food the rest of the day. I’ve given myself the gift of freedom from obsessing about meals, standing in front of the refrigerator, trying to figure out what looks good in the moment.
Corinne Crabtree:
Because I’m just going to tell you, unless y’all are some kind of unicorns running around in the field. I’m the kind of person that if it’s dinner and I got to find something that I want, I’m usually tired at night. About 50% of the week, by the time I hit dinner, I’ve not had an amazing day. I run a big ass company. And let me just tell you, we have problems sometimes. Shit doesn’t work. There are days where there are problems. I got 25 team members. I’m going to be in meetings with most of them all day long today. Guess what? I don’t want to stand in front of the pantry and make a decision on what to eat tonight based on, I’m tired. I’ve had a long day. And here’s my list of the reasons why today sucked.
Corinne Crabtree:
But that’s what most of us do. And it’s like, I don’t want to have to do that to myself ever again. I did that for years and I paid the price in my weight. So I don’t think of it as a bad thing. I think of it as three minutes a day. This is what’s so crazy. We make planning our food for the day seem like some kind of extreme fucking event. It is three minutes of your day. Three. You have 24 hours. And for one hour, you’re going to have 57 more minutes to do whatever you want. But making a food plan for the day, I just think of that is a gift. But like I said, nobody has to do anything. Do whatever you want. Oh, I was itching.
Corinne Crabtree:
I’ve been listening to you for years. Just lost 30 pounds and want to maintain. I lost 30 pounds in Octavia, Octiva? Octavia? I know that I say it wrong all the time, and want to maintain using all of your concepts. Well, I’m just going to tell you that it’s going to be a transition. I don’t want to say it’s going to be hard. But you lost weight. I tell people, this is just my philosophy. And if you’ve been following me for years, you know this. You lose weight the way you want to live it. You lost weight in a way that got you the weight loss. Now you got to figure out how you’re going to live your life with food. So now you got to figure out how you’re going to incorporate regular foods, how you’re going to be around the foods that, before you were drinking shakes that maybe you felt uncontrollable around all this other stuff. You’ll just have to start doing it like the rest of us are doing it, and work on your mindset. I mean, that’s the best thing.
Corinne Crabtree:
I would just start listening to that podcast and start listening for excuses. Because when the shakes run out. Here’s how the brain works. When you do something radical like that, and I don’t know if you call it radical. But when you do something like that, let’s just say like that. What I don’t want to do is throw shade, because I know you’re proud. And let me just tell you, it takes commitment to do it. When you lose weight, you get all your kudos no matter what you do. I don’t think there’s any cheating. I don’t think there’s anything like that. So for weight loss surgery people, for all of you. So many of my clients have come to me after weight loss surgery. I don’t think it’s cheating. I don’t think it’s bad.
Corinne Crabtree:
But here’s where I think you have to watch out for in the pitfalls, which is, when you lose weight doing something where you don’t really change your mindset a lot, and you’re just making yourself. And you may have enjoyed those shakes. But where you’re really focused on that, and you’re not exactly addressing the demons you had before you had this mechanism in place, when you stop drinking the shakes and you start transitioning, your brain will only know the thinking that was involved with the shakes and the thinking that was involved when you were overweight. There was no new thinking that got developed in between. So now you’re going to need to really focus on the new thinking. And so I would really, really, really focus on that.
Corinne Crabtree:
And we have some members who lost their weight on it. They came to No BS. This is what I find very often when people have weight loss surgery or they do shakes or they do some kind of very strict eating plan, something along those lines, they end up coming in No BS because what they realize is, after they’ve lost the weight, now they’re really afraid of food. They never really got any kind of mindset work on how to feel in control of food, how to include foods and to be able to stop eating without binging or restricting or overeating and restricting. So those are some of the things to watch out for and to make sure that you’re paying attention to.
Corinne Crabtree:
I get stumped on what to eat. I don’t know where to start with that. If I knew what to eat, I wouldn’t be in the predicament being overweight. What am I missing? I write what I think I should eat. Please help. Well, you do know what to eat. This is the funny thing. If you didn’t know what to eat every day, you’d go hungry. I want you to think about that. I get stumped on what to eat. It’s like, no, not really. Every day you make choices on what to eat. You absolutely know what you want to be eating. You just need to listen to when you’re planning from shoulds, like why should I only eat that? What’s the benefit? Why shouldn’t I eat these things? Why am I afraid to eat them? Why not just plan them and learn how to eat?
Corinne Crabtree:
This is a big thing that a lot of people miss out on. When you start planning something. For all of my members, please pay attention, my No BS women. Tomorrow’s Q&A is going to be fire. I am teaching a concept around, it tastes so good that I think it’s going to be very helpful for all of you for learning how to stop eating when you’ve had enough instead of full. And the major reason why you keep overeating is because when you eat your favorite foods, you drop into the cycle of, Ooh, it’s just so good. And when you have that thought, your desire rises and you don’t want to stop. And you feel almost like you have to finish. So tomorrow I’m going to teach you why this happens, and what you can do to start slowing that down and flip the script to make it so much easier. And if you get good at that, you’ll be able to use that technique with the other stuff.
Corinne Crabtree:
All right. But for you, here’s what I would do. I would just ask myself, the only thing that you’re missing is you’re allowing yourself to believe that you don’t know what you want to eat. It’s like, you do know what you want to eat. You’re just afraid to admit it and to put it on your plan. And you’ve got to overcome the version of you that’s afraid to do that. You have to become the courageous version of you that now starts putting things on her plan that she thinks the diet entry has always told her is a no, no. That she thinks she can’t lose weight eating. She has to become courageous enough to put things on her plan that she’s, in the past, never been able to stop eating before, but wants to become the kind of person who can have those things and lose weight and not overeat them. We got to get you to wanting to be that person more than you sitting around wanting to be the person that’s confused and afraid to put down what she really wants to eat.
Corinne Crabtree:
I’m going to a new restaurant tonight. And I struggle with restaurants. I will make a plan, but a lot of times at restaurants, I don’t stick to it. Do you have any advice? Yeah. What do you normally eat? And put that on your plan. First thing first, I tell people this all time. One of the biggest hacks you got to get is put down whatever it is you’re going to want to eat. And then when you go, you eat it. And this is the difference. You are not green-lighted to eat like a maniac, but you put it on your plan so that you have to sit there and eat these things with a conscious mind. Right now you’re doing it unconsciously, which is, I’m going to plan like I’m going to be amazing. And then, time has told me that when I get there, I just fall into what I want in the moment.
Corinne Crabtree:
So now what I want to do is, I want to plan for the person who’s been ordering what they want, because when you just order what you want, you shut down thinking about anything else. You just get real locked in on what you’re having. The first phase we have to change is going to the restaurant, your plan having what it is that you want, and you sitting there thinking like, geez, it’s going to be hard to lose weight this week eating that. I want you to eat it consciously with all the thinking. Because right now you’re eating it in like a blind snowstorm. And I know this sounds crazy, but you got to start there. You have to go in, and it’s got to not be as fun.
Corinne Crabtree:
When you just go and order what you want, and experience relief of like, okay, this is what I’m going to eat, then you just eat the food and then come home with regret and shame. We got to flip the script. We got to be eating and be very conscious. And it not be so fun because now we’re hearing all the thinking. You will probably eat a little less. The more you just allow yourself to just listen to what you think, most of you will see, oh, I could plan some of these foods. Or you may see, when you eat them consciously and you’re eating them with all these thoughts of like, man, I bet I won’t even lose weight this week, or whatever it is, you may start to see, it wouldn’t be so bad to go out to eat every now and then, and just not eat everything that I want, but experience getting what I want when I weigh in, experiencing getting what I want when I leave with pride. I want you to get what you want in a bigger way. Not just in a meal with fried chicken tenders and French fries.
Corinne Crabtree:
After eating my planned dinner and stopping when satisfied, I find myself looking for other things to eat in the kitchen. There’s no finding yourself. Let’s talk about it like a grown ass woman. I eat my planned dinner. I stop at enough. I get up. I go to the kitchen and I do this. First thing you got to do is tell the truth as to what happened. You’re telling it as if, Corinne, I just notice I’m in the kitchen. And I think a celestial being must have took over my body. I don’t even know what happened. You have to start talking about it like, I made the decision to go stand in the pantry because you actually did. You may not know why you did it. It may be happening fast, but nobody gets out of a chair without the first thought being, stand up. I want all of you to think this. There is never anything happening in my life to where I didn’t think before it happened. I might not hear the thought, but it isn’t because it’s just happening to me. That’s important as the first step.
Corinne Crabtree:
So now that you know that you do this, and this is your habit, the first thing you got to do is quit talking about it as if it’s just happening to you. So you make a plan today. When I get done eating, and if you’re a NO BS woman, this needs to go in your 24 hour plan. You know how we have that question, what’s likely to get in my way? What’s likely to get into my way is me cleaning up the kitchen and then going to the pantry and not stopping myself. So you can put sticky notes up that says, “Stop, bitch. Quit staring at me.” You could put some environmental triggers up.
Corinne Crabtree:
You could have an alarm. Before you sit down and eat dinner, you could have an alarm that goes off in 20 minutes. And then it says, if you’re in the kitchen, get out. You could delay cleaning up the kitchen by 20 minutes. So you finish eating. You remove yourself from your normal pattern of just going to the kitchen, just going ahead and cleaning up and finding yourself looking for food. You could say like, all right, when I’m done eating, I remove myself for 20 minutes and I sit and do something else thinking about, all right, when I go clean the kitchen, today I’m not going to find myself anywhere. Here’s my plan of attack. Dishes first. Wipe down the tables, second, whatever it is. You got to get it all conscious.
Corinne Crabtree:
Y’all got to quit talking like, Corrine’s going to say a magic word. And suddenly I’m going to snap out my coma that I go into every night where a zombie takes over my body and controls my mouth. The first step to losing weight is taking ownership that what goes in is all you. What goes in your mouth is all you. There is no husband or wife out there right now who is making you eat anything. I don’t care if they buy it. I don’t care if they gift it to you. I don’t care if they pout and want you to eat it. You can’t eat without consent from yourself.
Corinne Crabtree:
There’s no child, no mama, no friend, no boss, no partner, no boyfriend or girlfriend. There’s no fucking reason why you’re eating other than, in that moment, I decided yes or no. And when we get that going, then you start looking for ways to take authority. When you’re still in the blame game, or the shit just happens to me and that’s why I eat game, you’ve given up authority. And it’s going to take you having authority in order to make different choices for yourself, to show up differently for yourself.
Corinne Crabtree:
March baby. A March baby is somebody who joined my membership in March, for all of you who are wondering. I’m journaling. I’m faithfully planning things that I like to eat. But [inaudible 00:48:04] should I be leveling up to best foods to get weight loss moving? I don’t know if you want to. Look, there’s nothing wrong with that. Just try it. Just try adding some best foods in and be like, do I enjoy this? Do I like it? You may be ready. Can you imagine if I sat around when I was losing my hundred pounds. The way that I lost a hundred pounds was, every single day asking, is there something today that I can do that’s a little it better than yesterday? If I thought eating better foods or making changes and stuff was like, Ooh, is that diet mentality? Ooh, is that wrong? I would’ve never gotten anywhere.
Corinne Crabtree:
You know what I decided? I’m going to try some shit and see what happens. I’m going to change my attitude about this stuff. I’m going to quit talking about things like it’s a punishment. It ain’t a punishment to eat a vegetable. All of y’all, y’all sit here and y’all treat fruits, veggies, and proteins and shit as if they’re the bad food. Or you’re treating Ding Dongs, chips and Twinkies like they’re the bad food. Ain’t none of them good or bad. They ain’t got a conscience. They’re not morality based. It’s just food. Get over it.
Corinne Crabtree:
This is the way I like to think about it. Do I enjoy this? Is it helpful for my body? Do I like it? Is this something that over time when I’m eating it, it helps me with my goals. And that can be potato chips. I eat chips. I have just figured out how to eat them in ways where I don’t clear the bag out. I don’t Hoover them anymore because I allow myself to have them. I also know how many times in a week I can eat chips and still have plenty of energy. If I’m eating chips instead of lots of veggies. I also notice I don’t shit the way I like to. Mama likes to have a good clean colon. But I think on these levels. I’m always thinking about how does this help me? Am I helping myself? Do I like my reasons for it? That’s the point.
Corinne Crabtree:
All right, everybody, I have got to go to the bathroom. Mama’s sitting here about ready to pee her pants. Let me remind you of a couple things. This Facebook Live happens once a month. You can find us over at NoBSfreecourse.com. If you sign up for the free course, you will get a notice every month of when I go live. So you can make sure that you don’t miss it.
Corinne Crabtree:
I also have the podcast, Losing 100 Pounds with Corinne. If you enjoyed this Facebook Live, I really want you to do me a favor. If you feel okay with sharing it to your private page, because I curse, please share this episode. If you are listening to the podcast, please screenshot and share the episodes. And if you want, you can also just tag someone that may be your accountability partner, maybe someone that you talk a lot about weight loss with, maybe they weren’t here. You just tag them in the comments and they will be able to watch this video. All right, y’all. Y’all have an amazing month. I’ll see you next month, 10:00 AM, third Tuesday of the month for weight loss Q&A. Bye y’all.
